75 Overlooking OffensesPosted: September 20, 2013
The seventh secret to finding humility is: Overlooking offenses.
A man’s wisdom gives him patience; it is to his glory to overlook an offense. Proverbs 19:11
Pride comes from shame. Shame affects how we view peoples’ behavior towards us. Pride makes us overly sensitive to offenses. When we are in our pride and shame we most often attribute negative motives to others and judge them. We want to correct those who have offended us and we feel impatient with them. However, we are the ones who need correcting when we judge others. We need to get the logs out before we attempt to correct anyone else. (Matthew 7:3-5)
Our own shame leads us to interpret others as being offensive. Shame comes from storehouses of memories in our hearts. These memories can trigger us by reminding us of times during which we felt shame. We do not need to consciously remember what happened in the past to feel shame in the present. Just knowing where shame came from can help us let go of it. The bad news is, we cannot free ourselves from shame. The good news is, by God’s grace and through humility, we can let go of shame.
The book Humility by Andrew Murray has given me powerful ideas. He says that we cannot make ourselves humble. We cannot use these “secrets” of humility to make ourselves humble. Rather, we allow them to highlight the ways in which we are not humble. God alone works true humility in us. “Who is wise and understanding among you? Let him show it by his good life, by deeds done in the humility that comes from wisdom…But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere. Peacemakers who sow in peace raise a harvest of [rightness]” (James 3:13, 17-18)
When we realize that we have taken an offense we confess this to God, ask Him to free us and then ask Him to work His humility in us. “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all [unrightness].” (I John 1:9)
Even if someone intentionally offends us, we do well to overlook it. When we believe their view of us is less than what we think we deserve we try to improve how we look to them. Catering to others’ opinions only has the opposite effect, however, and leads to a lower opinion of us in their eyes. And when we feel offended, we tend to be offending towards others. We become like Jesus when we remain silent in the face of unjust accusations. We can choose, through His power, to overlook an offense. (Matthew 26:59-63)
Hoping I didn’t offend anyone by this post,
WITH ME: Wisdom Intercession Teaching Hospitality Mercy Encouragement
Bringing grace and truth to the downcast; comforting others with the comfort, which we received. We have a dream & need support and prayers.
Back to Outline: http://www.livingwithperfectionism.wordpress.com
Back to outline: http://www.livingwithperfectionism.wordpress.com